A LAP-BAND FOR THE UNIVERSE

Headlines: Does My ASStroid look big in this?

The Nobel Prize went to three guys whose find was quite distracting;

The universe, they proved, is expanding not contracting.

Just like us, it’s getting bigger, so now it needs to trim

By eating right and spending time in its Universal Gym.

Money: But can it put the seat down on the toilet?

The iPhone 4S was just rolled out

To some apathetic cheers;

The big thing: it talks back to you,

But my spouse has done that for years.

Sports: Sports Shorts

The D’back beat the Brewers to take it to game five,

 And the Phillies beat St. Louis to keep their hopes alive.

The NBA looks ready, but Tiger still has warts;

Iowa’s got NASCAR and that’s your day in sports.

Life: Steve Jobs  1955-2011

Let’s take time out to recognize an iCon in our time;

The CEO of Apple leaves us in his prime.

He was simply like no other, such an innovative guy,

We’ll think of him each time we see that uncapped Apple ‘i’

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