Headlines: Only in America.
On Thursday Oscar Ramiro Ortega was arrested on the spot,
For driving to the White House to take a well-aimed shot.
The details of the incident show just how diverse we are:
A Latin shooter wields a Romanian gun and drives a Japanese car.
Money: Honey, I think we need a bigger outlet.
Lincoln still is clueless with their MDX make over,
It’s gets 19 MPG every time you turn it over.
And AAA announced today that gas prices will give us no relief,
No wonder 20,000 people have reserved themselves a “Leaf”.
Sports: He didn’t bring his “A” game.
Golf was big this week with the start of the President’s Cup,
But Tiger’s game was absent and he and Stricker just blew up.
Steve Williams, Tiger’s ex-caddie, must be loving this new win,
But one can only hope he’s learned to keep his private thoughts within.
Life: The good, the bad and the “we totally saw this coming”.
This week Justin Timberlake danced at the Marine Corps Ball,
And it turns out Justin Bieber isn’t a father after all.
Regis is leaving Kelly, but the biggest news of course,
Is that Ashton’s little flings made Demi file for divorce.
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