Headlines: Who Needs Ammo?
The army in old Mexico is not the one of old;
The one that fought for Spanish gold with bravery untold.
They were bold caballeros who fought until the death,
But now they’re rather mellow, finding 15 tons of meth.
Money: FBI Finds Out That Steve Jobs Was Different From the Rest of Us!
This week the FBI released its file on Steve Jobs;
They called him an elitist who would often act the snob.
They said that he did acid and probably smoked some pot,
But he’s the one who did create so many toys iBought.
Sports: It’s The ‘Lull Season’
Of NBA and college hoops there’s just not much to write,
And I’m only watching hockey cuz I’m hoping for a fight.
No football hype, no Tebow bash, no fans in soccer riot;
Why even Giselse Bundchen has decided to stay quiet.
Life: ‘Beach Gizzers’ Back Together at the Grammys
This Sunday is the Grammys, an all-star music fest;
The Beach Boys will be singing, but they’re hardly at their best.
Their skin is chapped and leathery, their voices strained and dry,
But their music always takes us back to those golden days gone by.
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