![\"This](\"https:\/\/fromabirdseyeview.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/not-listening1-150x150.jpg\")
<\/a>This about sums it up<\/strong><\/p><\/div>\n We’ve been going through some conversations around our house that I suspect are not all that uncommon.\u00a0 They go something like this:<\/p>\n Me:\u00a0 Can you please turn up the TV<\/strong> so I can hear it.\u00a0\u00a0 Him:\u00a0(no response)\u00a0 Me again:\u00a0 I said, PLEASE TURN UP THE VOLUME!\u00a0 or<\/p>\n Him: Wodge bleit heog thu oebnog.\u00a0 Me:\u00a0 What?\u00a0 Him:\u00a0 I said, bleit heog thu oebnog!\u00a0 Me:\u00a0 I can’t understand you. Quit mumbling!<\/p>\n Obviously, what we have here is a failure to communicate<\/strong>.\u00a0 Or hear.\u00a0 He keeps the volume down so low on the TV that a rabbit couldn’t hear it.\u00a0 His mumbling is such that invariably waitresses always ask him to repeat his order.\u00a0 When they don’t, he usually ends up with the elk’s ear\u00a0souffl\u00e9<\/strong> or stuffed frog gizzards and then he wonders what went wrong.\u00a0 It’s gotten to the point that the most frequently used words around here were “huh?”, “whaaaat?” and “For Heaven’s sake, speak up!”.\u00a0 Something had to be done before we were reduced to sign language.<\/p>\n Believe me, you want to be in the pink<\/strong><\/p><\/div>\n It was a choice between a visit\u00a0to an ENT doctor or\u00a0 marriage counseling.\u00a0\u00a0<\/strong>Since\u00a0Medicare doesn’t pay for marital interventions we elected to go with hard science over navel-gazing.\u00a0 My husband had the first appointment but I tagged along on the theory that four ears are better than two.\u00a0 Especially when\u00a0two of those ears don’t hear so well to begin with.\u00a0\u00a0We told the doctor that we had problems hearing each other and had a lunch<\/strong> bet<\/strong> on whose problem it is.\u00a0 The first step was a comprehensive hearing test to diagnose\u00a0his hearing at different decibels and tones .\u00a0 It also tested how clearly he could distinguish similar words.\u00a0 Sounds simple enough.\u00a0 However, in order to obtain the total silence needed to conduct the test, they escorted him into\u00a0what can only be described as an in-house diving bell<\/strong>.\u00a0 It is a thick, steel chamber with padded walls (not the first time we’ve seen those<\/em>) with a small window in which to view the audiologist performing the test.\u00a0 Once he was seated and hooked up she heaved a huge lever to close the door tightly.\u00a0 I’ll stop right here and just say that if you are the least bit claustrophobic, do not<\/em> get a hearing test.\u00a0 The test then proceeded with beeps and tones<\/strong> and upon hearing them, he had to\u00a0squeeze a button.\u00a0 Kind of like when you need more morphine in the hospital only the result isn’t as much fun.\u00a0 The second part of the test consisted of computer-generated words that he had to\u00a0repeat.\u00a0 Things like “deer” and then “fear” or “hang” and then “hand”.\u00a0 The volume is also modulated so that some words are said more loudly than others.\u00a0 In other words, it’s like listening in on a lively discussion<\/strong> in the hotel room next to yours –\u00a0you hear about every other word.<\/p>\n The results for my husband were middling – he has good hearing at normal tones but severe hearing loss<\/strong> with high tones.\u00a0 The doctor explained that is very typical hearing loss as we age.\u00a0 He said it was borderline as to whether he needs a hearing aide and suggested waiting until it became a noticeable problem.\u00a0\u00a0Really?\u00a0\u00a0In my opinion we already have a noticeable problem\u00a0<\/strong>when I practically have to do jumping jacks to get his attention about the\u00a0TV volume.\u00a0 So I asked the doctor why my husband often doesn’t hear me.\u00a0 At which point he just smiled and said, “Perhaps he’s just not listening<\/strong>“. Perhaps?\u00a0 Perhaps?!<\/em>\u00a0\u00a0I think they refer to that as “selective” hearing – always aware when being called to dinner but never quite hears the request to take out the garbage.\u00a0 At least now I had confirmation from a medical professional.<\/p>\n Do I need one for every hair color?<\/strong><\/p><\/div>\n The next week it was my turn.\u00a0 I have had fairly severe ringing in my ears<\/strong> for the past five years so I explained to the audiologist that I might\u00a0not hear high tones correctly.\u00a0 It was sort of like telling my golf group before a round that I hurt my wrist that morning.\u00a0 Always good to have an excuse at the ready beforehand.\u00a0 The audiologist just smiled – I guessed I’d just given her the equivalent of “the dog ate<\/strong> my homework<\/strong>” and she wasn’t buying it.\u00a0 I was strapped into the Now, two weeks later,\u00a0I try to speak in louder, lower tones.\u00a0 He still mumbles.\u00a0\u00a0I’m looking in to getting him a “selective” hearing aide<\/strong>.\u00a0 And just to be safe, I’ve discovered that the local community college\u00a0offers a course in American Sign Language.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" By Suzanne Sparrow Watson We’ve been going through some conversations around our house that I suspect are not all that uncommon.\u00a0 They go something like this: Me:\u00a0 Can you please turn up the TV so I can hear it.\u00a0\u00a0 Him:\u00a0(no … read more![\"Believe](\"https:\/\/fromabirdseyeview.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/Final-Audio-Pic-small-150x150.jpg\")
<\/a>![\"Do](\"https:\/\/fromabirdseyeview.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/hearing-aid-150x150.jpg\")
<\/a>electric chair<\/del> seat, and waited to hear the beeps.\u00a0 I was sailing along, feeling very good about things, until I sensed that the interval between beeps seemed to be increasing.\u00a0 Or was it?\u00a0 I began to push the button like a crack addict at an arcade\u00a0<\/strong>– \u00a0random but in the hope that I would “hit” once in a while.\u00a0 My heart began to\u00a0pound.\u00a0 I was certain that she was going to find me profoundly deaf.\u00a0 I began to think about the display of hearing aides she had in the waiting area and which one might best blend in with my (current) hair color.\u00a0\u00a0 Finally, she unlatched the door and printed out my results.\u00a0 We both walked into the doctor’s office where a nurse immediately took my blood pressure<\/strong>.\u00a0 I have never had a systolic reading over 110 in my adult life.\u00a0 My reading that day?\u00a0 137!\u00a0 At last the doctor came in and said, “Well, I think your husband owes you lunch.\u00a0 You have perfect hearing”.\u00a0 As to why the sound is so low when he watches TV?\u00a0 The doctor explained that he probably just isn’t as interested as I am in hearing it.\u00a0 Well…it is an election year so, yeah, that’s plausible.<\/p>\n