Headlines:  Do they settle the election with a jump ball?

Mikhail Prokhorov, the Nets’ owner, wants to be the Russian prez,

He will face Putin and won’t be scared, or at least that’s what he says.

He acknowledged that even he isn’t safe from gulag prison stays,

At least his players can advise him on  surviving jailhouse days.

Money:  Perhaps people DO have too much discretionary income.

The retailers are weighing in on what’s selling this holiday,

Lego, Barbie and Elmo are apparently here to stay.

Lingerie sales are way up and there’s a new product for those who dare,

You can impress your friends and family with a bra worn as outerwear.

Sports:  I wouldn’t bet against him.

The Global Language Monitor has issued a decree,

From now on it will be “Tebowing” when a player takes a knee.

Much has been made of Tim’s actions but after Sunday’s big comeback,

Maybe we ought to just shut-up and give the guy some slack.

Life:  The trifecta.

Jen Aniston has been named the “Hottest Woman of All Time”,

At 42 years old she is smart and in her prime.

All three Kardashian sisters made the covers of the trashy mags,

Is it too early to declare them the “All Time Most Likely to Make You Gag”?

What better stocking stuffer than a redposey?



Headlines:  Please pass the Grey Poupon.

The Brooklyn Bridge was closed on Saturday and 700 were arrested,

The group “Occupy Wall Street” kept the thoroughfares congested.

They’re trying to focus attention on the greed of the big shots,

But the executives couldn’t hear them – they’re all out on their yachts.

Business:  So, we all just need to spend more money?

Economists just reported consumer spending hit its low,

And the economy for the next 10 years will most likely remain slow.

They say that Christmas will be lean with so many people on the dole,

Guess Santa should be stocking up on lots of lumps of coal.

Sports:  Karma, baby.

Sidney Crosby of the Penguins has had problems with concussions,

And whether he should play or not has been the subject of discussions.

We think it’s part of some grand scheme, if we may be so bold,

To pay him back for keeping us from winning Olympic gold.

Life:  Did he celebrate with Dr. Pepper?

Not much news occurred this weekend, and you know it’s slow when,

There’s lots printed about another wedding for Jennifer Aniston.

The biggest event that we saw, a sight we couldn’t miss,

Was Gene Simmons getting married and sealing it with a KISS.

Give a wedding present that can’t be duplicated – a tribute to the life of the happy couple!  Visit to order.