Category Archives: News

Posted in News

Only 104 Shopping Days ’til Christmas

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Thank you all for a record viewing weekend and your nice comments about our 911 tributes.  Now back to something lighter.

Monday, September 12, 2011

You know that Rick Perry was once a big Dem.?

Now as governor of Texas, he can hardly stand them.

He campaigned for Al Gore at their national convention

And prob’ly had a hand in his Internet invention.

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A$ I wandered through Co$tco on a day in $eptember,

I $aw holiday trinket$, like it wa$ December.

We all know the rea$on for thi$ premature cheer;

 Gue$$ it’s good-bye to $ummer and Happy New Year!

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The streets are again now free of some thugs.

While domestic abuse, the guns and the drugs

Are all in decline around this time of year;

The National Football League season is here.

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Ashton Kutcher is now the new ‘Man’ on the scene;

He is taking the place of whacked-out Charlie Sheen.

On the set he is always seen laughing and grinning

And why shouldn’t he, he’s the one that is ‘WINNING!’

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Posted in News

American Jobs Act 1 Scene 1

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Friday, September 9, 2011

Our president spoke harshly to Congress last night;

Half applauded, while the other half groaned.

Obama’s determined to create and save jobs,

Top priority is saving his own.

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It’s going the way of vinyl records and the vacuum tube,

It’s as out of date as a hula hoop and a Rubik’s cube

Its future is like that of the typewriter, or so the techies say;

Just when I learned to run the darn thing, the PC’s becoming passé.

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Wives are being ignored , so girlfriends they’ll call;

Or perhaps they’ll spend a bit more time at the local mall.

They thought that they were married, but their husbands have departed;

They’ve crawled into their man caves, ‘cuz football season’s started.

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If the economy’s getting you down

And by the market you’re getting drubbed;

You can escape to the 60s this TV season

On Pan Am­ to the Playboy Club

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Posted in News

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

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September 8, 2011

Restaurants are attempting to increase our weight some more,

They now want to take food stamps at all the fast food stores.

The national obesity experts say that’s not the way we should behave,

And say our taxes will now be used to pay from “burger to grave”.

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Baby boomers are now considered to be the most stressed out,

Watching retirement fade as their stocks have taken a clout.

Experts are advising calm and “not to over-medicate”,

This – to a generation that doesn’t know how to be straight.

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Maryland’s Terrapins have new football “uni’s”,

And the best thing being said is they look a little loony.

More embarrassing still, they have the same theme,

And look remarkably like the women’s roller derby team.

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The Kennedy Center has revealed this year’s honorees,

It’s a very distinguished group that will be on their marquee.

With Ma and Diamond tributes no one will be bored,

But what accent will Streep use when she gets her award?

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Posted in News

Back to School . . . Congress!

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Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Our congress can’t play well with others,

Or use their time wisely it seems;

They’re just coming in from their recess,

Firmly set in their partisan teams.

Off to school go our kids for the learning

Of lessons about right and wrong,

Maybe kids can help to teach congress

Some lessons in getting along.

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Yahoo has put Carol Bartz in the gang

With the likes of Koogle and Semel and Yang

All past CEOs, who were given the shoo

Seems there’s not much to Yahoo about at Yahoo!

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In New York, Open play for both gals and guys

Was halted because of the threatening skies.

With no roof on the courts, in the water came rushing;

What would you expect at the Meadows called Flushing?

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Eddie Murphy’s been picked to host the next Oscar,

 An improvement’s a virtual lock;

For he follows James Franco whose face had the look

Of a man who’d been under a rock.

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Posted in News

IT’S UNOFFICIALLY FALL

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September 6, 2011

With Labor Day behind us the campaigns get more intense,

But the Presidential season has seldom made less sense.

The Republicans are bickering, Obama’s back is to the wall,

Huckabee leads the Gallup, and he’s not in the race at all!

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European stock markets have gone into the dumps,

Based mostly on the U.S. unemployment slump.

Now in addition to our recovery and our job goals to pursue,

Apparently we have to worry about rescuing Europe too.

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College football is back again to amuse and entertain,

And most of the top teams did well, except for Notre Dame.

TCU lost a close game, with Baylor scoring late,

And the reigning champs, the Auburn Tigers nearly lost to Utah State

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The annual MDA Telethon carried on with Jerry gone,

Nigel Lithgoe and some beauties capably carried on.

They raised $61M in six hours, more than in past years,

Looks like people are willing to pay not to have Jerry appear.

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Posted in News

Obama’s Pre-game Speech

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Friday, September 2, 2011

Obama set his speech to Congress, next Wednesday was the date,

But Boehner said, that is the day of the GOP debate.

So he moved the speech to Thursday, but the time won’t be the same,

‘Cause he knows he can’t compete with the Saints and Packers’ game.

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Chrysler’s on an up-tick, so Motor Trend reports;

Their sales are beating GM, Ford and the imports?

They’re selling trucks and minivans , cars in their bigger class;

How quickly we don’t care again about the price of gas.

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When it comes to franchise owners, LA seems to come up short,

From Georgia Frontiere to that blow hard, Frank McCourt.

If a Dodgers sale goes through, it could give us all angina,

As the gloves and shoes, now payroll, will all be made in China.

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JayLo and Mark Anthony – it looks like that gig’s over.

It seems that little Marky boy is quite the Latin rover.

Mark found a nice hotel room, but who did he check in with?

It’s hard to say because she signed in as a ‘Mrs. Smith’.

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Posted in News

LOST IN THE SHUFFLE

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September 1, 2011

Obama’s going to unveil a plan before an anxious nation,

We’re waiting to hear what will inspire brand new job creation.

Millions have no work, lost their income and their homes,

When those who should be unemployed, sit under the Capital Dome.

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AT&T, the giant telecom, wants a merger with T-Mobile,

But Justice doesn’t want them taking their dropped call problem global.

The company said that it’s concerned about its loss of speed,

But based on our experience, it’s really due to greed.

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The champion Boston Bruins lost their center for the season,

They say his two concussions are the overwhelming reason.

Marc Savard seems to be complying, acting bold and brave,

We think he should be joyous – think of all the teeth he’ll save.

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When we look at the new roster for “Dancing with the Stars”,

We think someone’s lost their mind, or been in way too many bars.

Chaz, Chynna, David, Ricki? Dr. Drew could be their mentor,

Is this a dancing program or a sequined rehab center?

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Posted in News

Dick Time

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Wednesday, August 31, 2011

With Rice and Powell firmly under the bus

Chaney’s new book has caused quite a fuss.

If you read In My Time I think you would find

That it should have been called, In My Own Mind.

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The car-sharing Zipcar is making a deal

With Ford and their Focus, the high-tech mobile.

If it works it will help college kids get around,

If not, they’ll be caught with their zipper down.

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When Hurricanes are mentioned, you think of Irene,

But the Hurricanes of Miami, though not as obscene,

Have put college football in water that’s hot;

We think that the Cheetah should be their mascot.

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Movies this summer they say were a snooze;

With Conan and Aliens, that isn’t big news.

Kids must have been facebooking or tweeting for fun;

Even Captain America couldn’t hit a home run.

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Money Whoas

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Tuesday, August 30, 2011

The Pentagon rented containers to use briefly in Iraq,

Never dreaming 10 years later they still would not be back.

So now the final late fee charge is darn close to $1B,

The generals would all be fired if they pulled that as civilians.

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Americans, it seems, are cutting back on debt,

Tired of stress and strain that causes them to fret.

We’re cutting up the cards, giving credit lines the freeze,

That will teach those bankers to charge outrageous fees.

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Michael Vick has a new contract to QB another year,

The Eagles will pay $100M in hopes he’ll cause the fans to cheer.

He says that as a person he has grown – improved his traits,

Maybe we should let the dogs be the ones to evaluate.

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Mel Gibson’s in two courts this week and won’t have many laughs,

His gal pal will get millions to compensate for all his gaffes.

Meanwhile his ex-wife will be receiving  her financial part,

Putting the final stake in the wallet of “Braveheart”.

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Posted in News

Little is Big

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Monday, August 29, 2011

Irene’s wiped out bridges and road in her wake;

Caused death and destruction and lots of heartache.

The lesson that’s learned on this wet Monday morn

Is that there is no fury, like a woman who’s scorned.

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The story of short sales and banks is confusing

The banks have to win while the homeowner’s losing.

They made the bad loans, but their actions are numbing;

As they won’t lift a hand ‘til the payments stop coming.

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This week fans of tennis all will be rushing

To take in the Open at the meadows in Flushing.

But the game’s in decline for U.S. women and men,

There’s only one player in both ranking’s top ten.

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What a joy to see baseball played like a game;

No contracts, no hold outs, no unions to blame.

The joy of just playing, the tears and the smiles;

The Little League game beats ‘the bigs’ by a mile.

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