WE’RE BACK WITH THE NEWS WITH THE RED, WHITE AND BLUES

Headlines:  What we need is some Purple Haze. 

This week we’ll celebrate the founding of our nation,

When our white-haired Founding Fathers fought the British for cessation.

Somehow we think they’d be appalled to see our red – blue divisions,

With politicians who can’t compromise and use polls to make decisions.

Money:   Beware of unintended consequences. 

The markets are red-hot but we’re still wary of Wall Street,

With one squawk from Europeans they could begin a big retreat.

We’ve already seen white papers written about the health care decision,

And we now have the blues – is a new tax what we envisioned?

Sports:  The good, the bad, and the downright awful. 

Phelps and Lochte competed in blue waters at the Olympic trials,

And Missy Franklin was a phenom with her red nails and flawless style.

Jeneba Tarmoh  raised the white flag and won’t make the Olympic team,

And poor Nastia Liukin fell twice, not quite the ending that she’d dreamed.

Life:  We wonder what L. Ron Hubbard has to say about this?

After five long years of posing Katie Holmes shook off the blues,

Secretly filing to end her “marriage” to her red-faced mate, Tom Cruise.

On Saturday Alec Baldwin’s bride looked resplendent in glittery white,

And sighed relief that Alec didn’t engage the priest in a fist fight.

Fast and Curious

Headlines: I Thought You Were Watching The Guns!

Of a recent government gun bust we became so very curious;

About an arms tracking tactic by the name of Fast and Furious.

The tactic was designed to find the leaders and the funds,

But somewhere in the process our agents lost 2,000 guns.

 Money: Anyone Seen My Keys and Glasses?

MF Global CEO, ex-Senator Jon Corzine

Is the subject of a scandal and is being much maligned

For a simple senior moment with regard to farmer’s millions;

It seems he can’t recall where he left one point two billion.

 Sports: You Can’t Buy A World Series on eBay

Albert Pujols, CJ Wilson will now wear Angel red,

  This historic trade in baseball was finally put to bed.

Angel fans should not forget the New York Yankee curse,

Just because you pay the most won’t mean you’ll come in first.

 Life: Do They Know Who I Am?

Hothead Alec Baldwin was thrown off an airplane just this week

When he refused to close his phone and continued with his tweet.

“I was singled out”, the disgruntled actor said.

Perhaps he really has 30 Rocks in his head.

You’ve thought about it, why not try it?

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