We Wish You a Merry Twixmas

by Bob Sparrow

Yes, here we are again at “Twixmas”, the week between Christmas and New Years, when I always find myself between “Mi Tu Phat” and “Yes, I’ll have another helping”.  I’m not sure who was in charge of setting up our holidays, but they should be fired!  The basic issue is that we’ve bundled three of our major holidays, where eating and drinking takes center stage, in the last five weeks of the year.  So, let’s see if we can reasonably move some of those special holidays around so it allows for proper celebration for each, without putting an undue strain on the stomach and liver.    

Let’s start with Thanksgiving, it is supposed to be a celebration of harvest in the fall, so let’s move it from the end of fall to the beginning of fall; after all, the first Thanksgiving was celebrated between September 21 and November 9 – so let’s move it back to the last Thursday in September.  Yes, I know Labor Day is around that time, but we can just move Labor Day maybe to sometime in August, a month that currently has no legal holidays.  Few are even sure what we’re celebrating on Labor Day, as we certainly don’t ‘labor’ that day, unless you’re having a baby.  How ever you celebrate it, it’s probably not a holiday where people stuff ourselves and are over-served, so let’s move it closer to Christmas.  

OK, with that settled, let’s move on.  Even though the exact date of Jesus’ birth is unknown, I think I’d get a lot of push back if I suggested moving Christmas from its’ December 25^th date.  Although, as I look at the host of holidays in December – Immaculate Conception Day, Bodhi Day (Buddhist), Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe Day (Patron Saint of Mexico), Hanukkah, it seems like everyone was trying to squeeze in a holiday before the end of the year, maybe it’s a year-end accounting thing.  But OK, let’s leave December for our religious holidays and annual write-offs.

So, we really need to get New Years further away from all the December festivities.  Most of the world uses the Gregorian calendar, but, for example a country like China, still keeps their holidays from their old calendar; so Chinese New Years starts on January 29 – the end of January is a big improvement over the last day of December.  As we look elsewhere, we see that the Jews were only slightly smarter than the Christians, holiday-wise, as Hanukkah moves around from November to December.  In Vietnam, Tet, the lunar new year, is celebrated this year for nine days at the end of January to the early part of February.  That’s getting better, although nine days of partying could be detrimental to ones health.  Islamic New Year is at the end of June!  Well played Muslins!

I know moving the holidays is a low priority on anyone’s agenda, or most likely not on the agenda at all, but perhaps when Trump is buying Greenland, taking back the Panama Canal and making Canada the 51^st state, he could change a few holidays around to better suit our social life.  I’m not holding my breath. 

Suzanne and I wish you all a happy and healthy new year!