A Couch Potatoe’s Take on the Olympics Highlights

by Bob Sparrow

Sweden Women Win Gold

If I thought I was going to get off the couch because football had ended, I was sadly mistaken – the Olympics have kept me firmly planted in front of the boob tube. And for whatever reason I always seem to turn on the TV when curling is going on, which was quite often. Being raised in California, I never curled, never heard of curling until recently, and after watching it for hours, I’m still not sure of all the rules, although it’s somehow magnetizing. I don’t fully understand it, but it seems like shuffleboard on ice, but not exactly. Watching men and women from all over the world curl, I wondered how they first became interested in seeing how accurate they are at sliding a rock on a sheet of ice. And while they were inventing the game they said, “Hey, let’s add a person or two with a broom to sweep a path on the ice for the rock to follow.”

I’ve learned that Canada had a very strong curling team and in fact, won the men’s gold medal this year, beating Great Britian. Really? Great Britian?!! I would have thought that countries like Norway, Finland and Sweden, where there is lots of ice, would be in there somewhere, although the game was invented in Scotland.

Biathlon – the natural pairing of skiing and shooting

But curling isn’t the only ‘unusual’ sport in the Winter Olympics – it’s like a committee sat down and thought about all the things one could do in the snow and on the ice and said, “Hey, let’s create some games out of this stuff and call it the Winter Olympics.” One of the first games they thought of was the biathlon, which would combine two things that naturally go together, cross country skiing and shooting a rifle! This year’s Olympics added a new sport, Ski Mountaineering, or ‘Skimo’ as it’s called, where one climbs up a mountain, either on skis or on foot carrying skis and then skis down the mountain. A woman from Switzerland and a man from Spain won the gold this year. I was on the edge of my seat!

There was of course all kinds of sledding, including ‘skeleton’, which seems like a fairly scary name for a sledding event. Sledding events include one and two person sledders either headfirst or feetfirst – perhaps going down sideways may be added in years to come.  Basically, all the sledding is just man or woman against gravity – gravity always wins.

Skeleton vs gravity

Probably one of the most interesting ‘outdoor’ sports at the Olympics is on the ‘half pipe’ with lots of turns, spins and flips with an occasional interesting crash landing. Practicing to perfect those moves has to be very painful, but fun to watch!

Aside from speed skating, which, to me, is just people going around in circles, the indoor sports, like hockey and figure skating hold the most interest.  The U.S. did win gold this year in hockey, with a dramatic overtime win over archrival Canada – but since players from both teams play in the NHL, for me, it loses a little something relative to the original amateur spirit of the Olympics. Although, being an amateur was eliminated from a lot of Olympic sports years ago.

France’s gold medal winners, Beaudry and Cizeron

I think the highest bar for performance in the Winter Olympics is in the pair ice dancing. France took the gold, U.S. took the silver and Canada took the bronze. The amount of time and skill required to coordinate all the jumps, spins and dance moves that make it look so graceful and effortless, is amazing.

But, now the Olympics are over and I guess I need to get into college basketball and wait for ‘March Madness’. Or, maybe turn off the TV and enjoy some of our great outdoor weather. Nah, March Madness is only about three weeks away – I think I can make it back on the couch by then!    

THE HEART OF COMPROMISE

By Suzanne Sparrow Watson

I fixed their logo

As you read this post you may think that I’m trying to eke out one more story about football, but really, I consider this a public service announcement. When the hoopla of the Super Bowl died down last week, sports journalists who were not covering the Olympics began to focus on next year’s Super Bowl. While they speculated about next year’s favorites (the Rams, Seahawks, Bills and Eagles) they skipped the most salient fact: next year the Super Bowl will be played on Valentine’s Day. If you think that is unusual, you’re right. The Super Bowl has never been on Valentine’s Day. The closest the game has ever come to wrecking relationships around the world was in 2022, when Super Bowl LVI was played on Feb. 13. But next year, due to the expanded schedule, the season has been extended one week, which is going to cause a lot of problems in households where one member is a fanatic, and one only watches the broadcast to see the commercials.

After all, Valentine’s Day is considered to be one of the most romantic days of the year. It is the busiest day of the year for florists, while candy and card sales go through the roof. Many a spouse has been given the cold shoulder if the day is not commemorated. To illustrate just how romantic the day is viewed, in the United States alone an average of 220,000 people get engaged every year on Valentine’s Day. It is thought to be the perfect day on which to propose, and many young people go to great lengths to tie the Valentine’s theme into popping the question. Somehow, I think next year’s proposals may lose some of the romance usually associated with “popping the question”. It will have to occur between downs but not interfere with a commercial, while trying not to drop the ring in the guacamole dip. I’m not sure any young woman grows up thinking that she will be competing with a Budweiser commercial for the most heartfelt moment of her special day.

To further complicate the situation, there are approximately 15-20,000 weddings that take place each year on Valentine’s Day. Forget about the fact that forevermore those couples will have to fight for dinner reservations and will be subject to overpriced fixed-prix menus on their anniversaries. The specific problem next year lies not with the bride and groom, who let’s face it, would not have scheduled their wedding on Super Bowl Sunday if they were fans. The problem is the cascading one faced by the invitees, especially if their favorite team is playing. People will be scrambling for excuses as to why they can’t attend, or perhaps there will be a lot of married people who attend alone while their spouse is at home watching the game, hands clutching a beer, perplexed as to why anyone would schedule a wedding on such an important day. I foresee a lot of arguments about “priorities” in the offing.

The only silver lining in the Super Bowl being pushed back a week is that next year it also coincides with President’s Day weekend. The day after the Super Bowl has long been one of the least productive days in the workforce so the good news is that next year everyone will officially be able to take off work on Super Bowl Monday. Perhaps that will give them time to look up the name of a good marriage counselor. I have a feeling a lot of people are going to need one. Just don’t say I didn’t give you plenty of warning.

Lack of Gridiron in the Diet

by Bob Sparrow

I’m trying to make the transition . . . wait, NO I’m not ‘transitioning’, I’m simply trying to transition from watching football 4-5 days a week to watching football zero days a week FOR THE NEXT SEVEN MONTHS!!!. This is not going to be easy! I thought the college football season ended in Cinderella-like fashion with the Curt Cignetti-led Indiana Hoosiers winning their first ever National Championship behind Heisman Trophy winning quarterback, Fernando Mendosa. Great stuff!!

I’m writing this before the Super Bowl, so I’ll have no highlights of the game (hopefully there will be highlights), the commercials (they could be more entertaining than the game) or the half-time performance (which has already caused some controversy). I will write the end of the blog after the game – I’m sure I’ll have a pithy comment or two.

Jordon Hundson and Bill Belichick

For me the Super Bowl is less Cinderella and more Ursula, the half-woman, half-octopus, from The Little Mermaid. I know, I’m bummed because the 49ers didn’t make it, nor did any of the other California teams, the Ram or the Chargers. I realize there was a West Coast team in the Super Bowl, and there was a West Coast player in quarterback, Sam Darnold, who is a San Clemente, Orange County guy; but my Pete Carroll hangover, and the fact that the Seahawks kicked the 49ers out of the playoffs this year, made it hard for me to root for them. But I’m not particularly a New England fan either. Haven’t we all been exposed to enough Patriot history this past year with 74-year-old, ex-coach, Bill Belichick canoodling with his 24-year-old girlfriend, plus having to listen to Tom Brady’s pedantic color-commentating? I digress. I do like Patriot quarterback Drake Maye and if the Patriots won, Mike Vrabel is the only person to win the Super Bowl as a player, an assistant coach and a head coach – but you probably heard all that if you watched the game.

The Super Bowl doesn’t just mark the end of football season, Super Bowl parties officially mark the end of my New Year’s Resolutions – way too much eating, drinking and weight gaining! As they say in sports . . . ‘Wait ’til next year’!

My usual remedy for ‘Lackofgridiron’ in my diet or Couch Potato Syndrome, is trying to pretend that PGA golf is just as exciting . . . it isn’t! But this year we have a one-step program to help bridge the gap between football and . . . next year’s football – the Winter Olympics.  This year’s Olympics are coming to us from Milan and picturesque Cortina d’Ampezzo, which is often called the ‘Queen of the Dolomites’ – part of the northern Italian Alps. Beautiful! So, forget about ‘Off Sides’, ‘Safety Blitz’ and ‘Roughing the Passer’ and start thinking of Double Axles, Moguls and “Gosh it looks cold over there.”

Much as we try to get away from politics, and one would think that the Olympics should be a good place to do that, this year we find that Russia is banned from competing due to their invasion of Ukraine. However, Russian athletes, who voice to the Olympic Committee that they do not support the war, can compete as ‘Individual Neutral Athletes’ – no Russian flag ceremony if they win, but back home they will face Russian roulette if they lose.

Post Super Bowl notes:

The Game: I can’t really comment on the game, it was so boring in the first half I fell asleep. The Commercials: For a cost of between $8 – $10 million dollars for 30 seconds, I was expecting more – pretty blah. The Prop bets: I had a tip that the Gatorade was going to be purple, so I bet it big . . . it was green. The Half Time Show: My Spanish is a little weak, so I’m still trying to translate Bad Bunny’s song. Nah, I was still sleeping.

WE CAN PUT A MAN ON THE MOON…

By Suzanne Sparrow Watson

…but we can’t find a cure for the common cold? How long have we been saying that? Probably since July 20,1969, when the Lunar Module Eagle first touched down on the Sea of Tranquility. After that monumental achievement every other goal seemed like it should be easily solved. Thus, the phrase, “we can put a man on the moon, but we can’t (fill in the blank)” began to be used for every frustrating problem we seemed incapable of conquering. You don’t hear that phrase so much anymore, most likely because we’ve conquered many of those problems. Or maybe we feel confident, or scared, that AI will soon do it for us. But this past week I harkened back to the “common cold” lament because, like so many others, I was brought down by the latest virus going around.

I haven’t felt like doing much and felt sick as a dog. Ironically, I was also dealing with a sick dog, which required me to dress up in something akin to a hazmat suit and take him to the vet. All the while, I wondered that with all the medical miracles that seem to happen on a daily basis, I’m laid low by the same malady that has plagued humankind for hundreds of years. I think there must be a lot of people down with the cold virus right now because last week The Washington Post published an article pondering the same question. Turns out, I guess not surprisingly, that finding a cure is just not that simple. There are more than 200 different viruses that can lead to cold symptoms, with rhinoviruses being the most common. That diversity makes it hard to develop a single vaccine or treatment that would effectively cover all strains.

According to the Post, last week the Yale School of Medicine published the results of a study in the journal Cell Press Blue (you subscribe, right?) about their research into the common cold. They cultivated miniature models of nasal airways to try to understand how upper respiratory viruses unfold, why they can be so variable, and how to make them less miserable. I’m all for that! The details of the study are a little gross, so I’ll forego that in case you’re eating breakfast. The upshot is that after examining thousands of individual cells, the researchers found that it’s not the virus, but the intricacies of the response in thousands of nasal airway cells, that determines whether a cold is quickly quelled or explodes into something more serious. The study showed that the quick production of a protein called interferon by the infected cells kept the rhinovirus in check, allowing it to infect fewer than 2 percent of the cells. When they suppressed interferon, about a third of cells became infected and the rhinovirus proliferated. A different immune sensor kicked in, and molecules related to inflammation increased, mucus production went into overdrive, and the nasal cilia slowed their pulsing. There’s a lot more technical stuff, but that’s the basic gist.

They concluded that there’s a reason that the cold is such a challenge to solve: disentangling immune responses to know which ones are beneficial, which ones help control an infection, and which ones contribute to severity of symptoms, is not straightforward. The lead researcher commented that if the common cold was an easy problem to solve, it would have been solved a long time ago. No kidding. Generations of people have been waiting. Maybe AI will finally be the key to the finding an answer. Clearly, it’s beyond the ken of we mere mortals. As skeptical as I am of AI, I will gladly hail its presence if it can keep me out of the Cold and Cough aisle at Walgreens. In the meantime, I’m going to fix more tea and get drunk on Nyquil.