Tag Archives: Pat Miles Zimmerman

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AN INTERVIEW WITH SUZANNE

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By Bob Sparrow and Suzanne Sparrow Watson

We’re changing our format a bit this week.  With the publication of the book Suzanne co-authored, Before All Is Said and Done, Bob thought it might be interesting to learn a bit about the writing process and how the book is faring now that it’s been on the market for a month.  So, the following is a discussion we had about the book – how it was written and how it’s doing. 

Bob:  How is it you came to write a book with Pat?

Suzanne: Pat is a good friend and for many years she was my next-door neighbor in Scottsdale.  After her husband died, she experienced many problems, most of which she had not anticipated.  As she spoke with other people, she discovered she was not alone – either they had similar experiences or knew someone who had.  Pat is a seasoned journalist who has won numerous awards for her in-depth interviews, so her natural inclination was to talk with people and write about the problems widowed people encounter, and perhaps more importantly, with experts about how to avoid those problems.

Pat knew that I had previously written a book, and of course is a loyal subscriber to this blog, so once she decided to write a book, she called me and said, “Here’s my idea and I’d like you to help me write it.”  It was a daunting thought at first, but I love to write, plus it was smack dab in the middle of the Covid lockdown – what else was I going to do?  So, I agreed to give it a go.

Bob:  How long did it take to write the book?
Suzanne:  All told it took two years from that first conversation to the publication of the book.  When we began the process, we weren’t certain what format the book would take or how it might all come together.  We did some market research and learned that most books for widowed people either focused solely on grief or were written from one person’s perspective.  We knew we wanted to include stories from a wide range of people on a variety of subjects.  We began interviewing people to see what kind of information we collected.  I conducted a couple of interviews, but it became clear that interviewing people was Pat’s forte, while writing was more in my lane.  We sort of fell into dividing up the work that way and it worked out perfectly.
Bob: What was the writing process like?
Suzanne:  It was a real eye-opener to me that how people express themselves in conversation during an interview is much different than how one reads.  When you are speaking with someone you might jump from topic to topic, circle back to something previously discussed, or not discuss things in their logical sequence.  That’s just how we all converse.  But when you are reading a narrative there needs to be clarity and a logical order to the information.  Pat would write the draft of the introductions and then sent me the transcripts of her interviews to weave into narrative form.  That was challenging, but once I got the hang of it, it became easier over time.
Bob:  How are sales going?
Suzanne:  Really well!  We won’t get firm numbers until the end of the quarter (this is standard in publishing), but we became the #1 “bestseller” on day one in the Estates and Trusts category on Amazon and have remained there for the past month.  Recently we have also been ranked #1 in the Grief and Bereavement and Love and Loss categories.  The book is definitely striking a chord with people and we’re very happy that people find it helpful.
Bob:  Why do you think it has resonated with so many people?
Suzanne:  People have asked me that a lot this past month.  The feedback I’m getting is that the book provides a vehicle to have conversations with a loved one or family members on a subject that typically has not been a comfortable topic of conversation.  As a Baby Boomer myself, I’ve now come to equate it to when The Joy of Sex was first published in 1972.  Prior to its publication no one really talked about sex in the way the book suggested.  It became a huge best seller so clearly people were willing to read about it, even if they didn’t openly talk about it.  I think we have done the same thing for preparing for a death.  Certainly not as fun, but just as thought-provoking!
Bob: Can people only order the book on Amazon?
Suzanne:  People can order on Amazon, or they can order through their local bookstore.
Bob: This is your second published book, what was your first one about?
Suzanne:  My first book, In the Enemy’s Camp, was really written as a gift to my mother-in-law.  She was a beautiful writer and kept a diary during her three years as a detainee in a Japanese prisoner of war camp during World War II.  Her strength and courage were remarkable, especially considering my father-in-law was very sick much of the time and she had to care for her two children, my husband and his brother, who were one and four years old when they went into the camp.  I took her diary and turned it into a book that incorporates the historical events occurring at the time.  I published the book before my mother-in-law’s 90th birthday and she had a ball going to book signings and speaking at clubs about it.  By far the best gift I’ve ever given! Amazingly, 17 years after publication people are still buying it on Amazon.
Bob:  Any future books in the works? 
Suzanne:  Well, as they say, “never say never”!  Pat and I have joked about writing a sequel.  There are a lot of people who struggle after the death of a loved one with moving forward and creating a new life.  We heard that a lot from widowed people – the “what do I do next?” problem.  At this point we have no plans to write the sequel, but as we’ve learned, you never know what the future might bring!
If you are interested in learning more about the book, or purchasing it, here is a link to the Amazon page:
If you do buy the book from Amazon, please take a minute to give it a review.  It really helps!
Posted in opinion

BEFORE ALL IS SAID AND DONE

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In October 2020, my friend and neighbor, Pat Miles Zimmerman, returned to Arizona from her summer home in Minneapolis with an idea for a book.  Pat’s husband, Bucky, had died of pancreatic cancer in February 2019, just three months after receiving his diagnosis.  When Bucky’s doctor advised Pat and Bucky to get their affairs in order, they thought their affairs were in order.  But as it turned out, they had been set for life, but not for death.  After Bucky died, Pat experienced a plethora of problems, many of which she had not anticipated.  As Pat spoke with friends about her experience, she learned that she was not alone: very few people prepare to leave this world.  And yet…we’re all going to.  As Pat observed, we prepare for a baby, to go away to college, to marry – really for all of life’s milestones – but we don’t plan for death. She was determined to address the issue head-on.  So, on that October day in 2020, she called me and said, “I have an idea for a book, and I want you to help me write it.”

Many people express a desire to write a book, but Pat’s background and experience brought credibility to the idea.  Pat was a revered part of the Twin Cities media landscape for more than a quarter of a century. She was a TV news anchor for WCCO-TV and KARE 11, she was also the creator and host of A Pat Miles Special for KARE and rounded out her career as host of The Pat Miles Show on WCCO Radio. Pat has won numerous accolades, including the National Television Academy’s Silver Circle Award and induction into the Minnesota Broadcast Hall of Fame. Needless to say, she is an expert at interviewing people and telling their stories.   

We started by doing some competitive research and discovered that most books written for widowed people are either written solely about grief or recount a singular experience with the death of a spouse.  Our idea was to provide a broad array of perspectives, from many people and on a variety of subjects.  As we delved more into our research and conversations, we realized that many of the problems widowed people encounter could have been prevented with some pre-planning.  It became apparent that this lack of preparation added unnecessary stress to an already stressful time.  As Pat learned firsthand, by the time someone receives a terminal diagnosis, it’s often too late to start planning. We decided that our book would not only address issues that occur after a death, but what actions need to be taken beforehand.  Thus, the title of the book is Before All is Said and Done.

After our research concluded, Pat spent the next 18 months interviewing dozens of widowed people to learn about their experiences.  The problems were varied – financial, legal, family dynamics, alcoholism, dementia, sudden death and of course, grief – just to name a few.  She then sought advice from experts on how to avoid the problems or how to better cope with a situation.  We learned some new concepts: end-of-life doulas who can guide a family through a terminal illness and “intention letters”, that convey the thought process behind unequal inheritances, how family assets or belongings should be distributed, or to pass on family values and history. Through her contacts Pat was able to interview such notables as Dr. Ronald Petersen, director of the Mayo Clinic Alzheimer’s Disease Research Center, Bonnie Carroll, a recipient of the Presidential Medal of Freedom for her work with military widows, and Melanie Bloom, the widow of NBC News correspondent David Bloom, who took her husband’s very public death and turned it into a public service.  Pat found doctors, lawyers, accountants, psychologists, and counselors who were all intrigued by the idea behind the book and wanted to participate. 

We quickly got into a rhythm for putting the book together; Pat would send me her thoughts or personal experience on a topic for the introduction, along with the transcripts of her interviews that pertained to that subject. I then turned the interview questions and answers into a narrative that combined the widows’ stories with advice and counsel from the experts.  We edited the subjects down to twelve chapters that deal with grief, estate planning, financial planning, blended family dynamics, dementia, sudden death (including suicide), COVID-19 deaths, military deaths (and why they are different), alcoholism, end-of-life doulas, self-care, and finally, examples of people who have come out the other side of grief to make new lives for themselves. 

It has been a long two years, filled with writing and rewriting, but finally, our book will be released tomorrow!  We are excited to share our work.  This is not just a book for those of us on Social Security.  In fact, the book includes several stories of women in their 30’s whose husbands died unexpectedly and left them with complex problems to solve.  The book is really for anyone who has a spouse, partner, children, or any loved one they will leave behind.  

If you would like more information here is a link to the Amazon page, where you can read about it and, we hope, purchase it: https://amzn.to/3BZBiJp

I have learned a lot about the book business in the past year.  One thing I learned is that if a book gets more than 50 reviews on Amazon it gets the attention of Goodreads, BookBub, and other book selling sites.  So, if you buy the book and have an account with Amazon, we would appreciate it if you could take a moment to write a review.  I also learned that there’s no faking it – Amazon tracks if you really bought the book. If you choose to buy the Kindle version, you must have read at least 30% of the book for your review to count.  They track that too. I think my next book is going to be about how Amazon works.

The past two years have both gratifying and educational.  Given that I spent my career in the financial services industry I believed I had all of my documents in order.  I didn’t. I learned, and am still learning, how to be a better writer.  But mostly I learned that you could embark on a long, sometimes difficult project with a friend and not only end up still friends, but better friends.  All in all, it’s been a great journey.

Posted in opinion

BEFORE ALL IS SAID AND DONE!

By Comments:6 Comments

In October 2020, my friend and neighbor, Pat Miles Zimmerman, returned to Arizona from her summer home in Minneapolis with an idea for a book.  Pat’s husband, Bucky, had died of pancreatic cancer in February 2019, just three months after receiving his diagnosis.  When Bucky’s doctor advised Pat and Bucky to get their affairs in order, they thought their affairs were in order.  But as it turned out, they had been set for life, but not for death.  After Bucky died, Pat experienced a plethora of problems, many of which she had not anticipated.  As Pat spoke with friends about her experience, she learned that she was not alone: very few people prepare to leave this world.  And yet…we’re all going to.  As Pat observed, we prepare for a baby, to go away to college, to marry – really for all of life’s milestones – but we don’t plan for death. She was determined to address the issue head-on.  So, on that October day in 2020, she called me and said, “I have an idea for a book, and I want you to help me write it.”

Many people express a desire to write a book, but Pat’s background and experience brought credibility to the idea.  Pat was a revered part of the Twin Cities media landscape for more than a quarter of a century. She was a TV news anchor for WCCO-TV and KARE 11, she was also the creator and host of A Pat Miles Special for KARE and rounded out her career as host of The Pat Miles Show on WCCO Radio. Pat has won numerous accolades, including the National Television Academy’s Silver Circle Award and induction into the Minnesota Broadcast Hall of Fame. Needless to say, she is an expert at interviewing people and telling their stories.   

We started by doing some competitive research and discovered that most books written for widowed people are either written solely about grief or recount a singular experience with the death of a spouse.  Our idea was to provide a broad array of perspectives, from many people and on a variety of subjects.  As we delved more into our research and conversations, we realized that many of the problems widowed people encounter could have been prevented with some pre-planning.  It became apparent that this lack of preparation added unnecessary stress to an already stressful time.  As Pat learned firsthand, by the time someone receives a terminal diagnosis, it’s often too late to start planning. We decided that our book would not only address issues that occur after a death, but what actions need to be taken beforehand.  Thus, the title of the book is Before All is Said and Done.

After our research concluded, Pat spent the next 18 months interviewing dozens of widowed people to learn about their experiences.  The problems were varied – financial, legal, family dynamics, alcoholism, dementia, sudden death and of course, grief – just to name a few.  She then sought advice from experts on how to avoid the problems or how to better cope with a situation.  We learned some new concepts: end-of-life doulas who can guide a family through a terminal illness and “intention letters”, that convey the thought process behind unequal inheritances, how family assets or belongings should be distributed, or to pass on family values and history. Through her contacts Pat was able to interview such notables as Dr. Ronald Petersen, director of the Mayo Clinic Alzheimer’s Disease Research Center, Bonnie Carroll, a recipient of the Presidential Medal of Freedom for her work with military widows, and Melanie Bloom, the widow of NBC News correspondent David Bloom, who took her husband’s very public death and turned it into a public service.  Pat found doctors, lawyers, accountants, psychologists, and counselors who were all intrigued by the idea behind the book and wanted to participate. 

We quickly got into a rhythm for putting the book together; Pat would send me her thoughts or personal experience on a topic for the introduction, along with the transcripts of her interviews that pertained to that subject. I then turned the interview questions and answers into a narrative that combined the widows’ stories with advice and counsel from the experts.  We edited the subjects down to twelve chapters that deal with grief, estate planning, financial planning, blended family dynamics, dementia, sudden death (including suicide), COVID-19 deaths, military deaths (and why they are different), alcoholism, end-of-life doulas, self-care, and finally, examples of people who have come out the other side of grief to make new lives for themselves. 

It has been a long two years, filled with writing and rewriting, but finally, our book will be released tomorrow!  We are excited to share our work.  This is not just a book for those of us on Social Security.  In fact, the book includes several stories of women in their 30’s whose husbands died unexpectedly and left them with complex problems to solve.  The book is really for anyone who has a spouse, partner, children, or any loved one they will leave behind.  

If you would like more information here is a link to the Amazon page, where you can read about it and, we hope, purchase it: https://amzn.to/3BZBiJp

I have learned a lot about the book business in the past year.  One thing I learned is that if a book gets more than 50 reviews on Amazon it gets the attention of Goodreads, BookBub, and other book selling sites.  So, if you buy the book and have an account with Amazon, we would appreciate it if you could take a moment to write a review.  I also learned that there’s no faking it – Amazon tracks if you really bought the book. If you choose to buy the Kindle version, you must have read at least 30% of the book for your review to count.  They track that too. I think my next book is going to be about how Amazon works.

The past two years have both gratifying and educational.  Given that I spent my career in the financial services industry I believed I had all of my documents in order.  I didn’t. I learned, and am still learning, how to be a better writer.  But mostly I learned that you could embark on a long, sometimes difficult project with a friend and not only end up still friends, but better friends.  All in all, it’s been a great journey.