By Suzanne Sparrow Watson
It looks so innocent
The summer doldrums are in full effect here in Arizona. With temperatures soaring well over 100 and the nightly lows in the mid-80’s, it’s an optimal time to be indoors. Apparently, it is also the perfect time for our smoke detectors to set off in the middle of the night. We are no strangers to problems with smoke detectors – they seem to have an almost human-like sense for the most annoying time to go off. Kind of like the neighbor who blares heavy metal music on the very night you retired early to read a good book. Last year we replaced all of our smoke detectors and inserted long-lasting batteries. We were under the naive illusion that we would be spared any problems for the next ten years, by which time we would either be dead or have moved. Not so fast.
Sadly accurate
I’ve had plenty of experience with chirping smoke detectors. As a new homeowner, I once thought the chirping was a sign that fire was imminent, so I grabbed the dog and ran outdoors in my nightgown, sure that I had evaded a fiery demise. The neighbors got a good laugh out of that one. I have also set the smoke detectors off numerous times while attempting to cook dinner. Most of the time it was simply my inept frying skills or a forgotten pot of soup that set off the alarm, although once I actually did set fire to the oven while cooking a roast. As the fire trucks rolled up to my house the neighbors got a kick out of that one too. In our current house the smoke detector in our living room went off one August night. The problem is it is a 16-foot ceiling, and we don’t have a ladder tall enough to reach it. Long story short, we ended up calling the non-emergency line at the fire department and three hunky firemen came to fix it. I thought the response was so gracious (and they were so cute) that I’ve tried to think of reasons to call them back ever since. Eventually we ended up taking the battery out of that unit, which I later discovered, has rendered it useless.
In any event, our latest foray into the vagaries of smoke detectors has been the smoke detector in our master bedroom (naturally) that has not just chirped but sounded the alarm several times over the past few weeks. Not a constant blaring, just one scream. Enough to give you cardiac arrest at 2 a.m. in the morning. Since the unit is only a year old, I knew it didn’t need to be replaced. The green light was going on and off every two seconds, which I learned means it needs to be reset. So up on the ladder we went, disconnected the unit, pressed the test button for 20 seconds, and then reinstalled it. Done and dusted!
But it got me to wondering WHY they always go off in the middle of the night. I did some research with the smoke detector company, and here is what I learned. The chirping is caused by the relationship between the battery’s charge level and a home’s air temperature. As a smoke alarm’s battery nears the end of its life, the amount of power it produces causes an internal resistance. A drop in room temperature increases this resistance, which may impact the battery’s ability to deliver the power necessary to operate the unit in an alarm situation. Most homes are the coolest between 2 a.m. and 6 a.m. That’s why the alarm may sound a low-battery chirp in the middle of the night, and then stop when the home warms up a few degrees.
Okay – whatever you say. But in Scottsdale, where the A/C is running at a constant temperature day and night in the summer, I’m not buying it. This week, a unit on the other side of the house has started chirping periodically – like every 10 hours or so. Always in the middle of the night. I still say there are gremlins built into every unit, intent on ruining a good night’s sleep and triggering anxiety with every “chirp”. At this point I feel a bit like Bill Murray and the gopher. Explosives may be my only option.